Songwriter Interview – Paul David Stanko – Gotta Rewind Myself

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On The Table Read Magazine, “the best entertainment eBook magazine UK“, Paul David Stanko shares the inspiration behind his new track, Gotta Rewind Myself, and what he loves about making music.

Written by JJ Barnes

www.jjbarnes.co.uk

I interviewed Paul David Stanko about his life and career, his new single Gotta Rewind Myself, and his creative process.

Tell me a bit about who you are.

For as long as I can remember, I have loved music. I would dance around my parent’s living room as a kid, lip syncing to the records they had—mind you, this was the early ‘70’s and my parents were not what you would call “hip”!  My dad was stuck in the 1940’s with the big band era and my mom went down an easy listening rabbit hole!  I was lip synching to The New Christy Minstrels and the Carpenters. But I loved the feeling music and song gave me. 

When it came time to go to college, the only thing I could think to do was music. I applied to several colleges and Coe College in Cedar Rapids, Iowa, gave me an impressive scholarship. So, I set my sights on being a school music teacher.

While at school, I was one of the only drummers on campus at the time and kept getting pulled into all the ensembles to play drum set—and I discovered I really didn’t like kids much—so I changed my major from education to performance.

I fell in love with a large cousin of the xylophone, the marimba, and spent hours perfecting my craft.  I was going to be the first world class marimbaist with a purple mohawk.  It was the 1980’s and I loved messing with my hair.  The day of my junior percussion recital, I had finished directing my church choir for the season, and I drove to the mall and had them re-shave my hair into the mohawk I had donned for spring break that year and colour it vibrant purple.  Picture the moment: the lights dimmed, the audience hushed, and I walked on stage in my black tuxedo brandishing what one of my fraternity brothers fondly called a purple badger on my head—I thought it was stunning.  It was a good thing I could play, because the classically focused faculty was not thrilled with the theatrics (at the intermission, I also had a costume change into a shirt that matched my hair). The jazz and pop teachers were more supportive. 

During college, I shed my protected, suburban background and began to discover who Paul David was—or was supposed to be. I, quite by accident, discovered my sexuality was not what I thought it was going to be.  In college, I met my soul mate—who knew it’d be a guy! I tussled with my queerness bouncing from girlfriend to boyfriend as I discovered who, and how, I loved. 

I truly loved my college experience.  It was everything college should be.  However, when I graduated, I found not everyone was beating down my door to hire a purple mohawked classical marimbaist. 

Not really knowing where to begin, I got a job in a corporate-run record store.  It really didn’t pay enough to free me from my debts, nor did I have enough time being on salary to become the rock star (or classical marimbaist) that I wanted to be.  So, I moved back into food service, this time in management, while I tried to figure out how I was going to make this all work. 

During that time, I got a part time job at a local church where I was very comfortable.  I discovered I had something to say—both musically and spiritually. And in my heart, I was really a rock and roll baby.  I transitioned from part time to full time working for the Metropolitan Community Church in Minneapolis. I also chose to sell my marimba and bought instead an electric keyboard that I could program with percussion, bass, horns—all the things I needed to take the music ministry I was working with to a higher level.  In fact, that is still my main keyboard 25 years later in my home studio. 

While working with the church, I got to write and arrange a lot—and work with volunteers.  I polished my skills in not just composition and performance, but team building and leadership.  That career path resonated with my soul.

However, the Universe decided it was “time for Paul David to grow”.  I left that role for financial reasons and over the next two years, all I knew in my personal life was to be torn down to make a new creation.  

I ended a 15-year relationship when my partner-at-the-time got into drugs.  That adventure ended up with me. not only ending that relationship but losing my house.  The music went dormant for a while too.  I was playing in a few pit orchestras, but the personal music creation was put on hold until I was asked by a local orchestra to write something for them.  2006 saw the birth and world premiere of “Emergence”—a tone poem inspired by the coming out process written specifically for the Minnesota Philharmonic Orchestra, the country’s first LGBTQA orchestra.  Shortly after that, I met the man whom I would marry, Tom. 

As we put our life together, I began writing again and took a role with another church in their music department.  When the pandemic hit, I had a lot of time to work in my studio and began churning out the music I am releasing today.

When did you first WANT to write music?

Even though I started writing earlier, I think I really WANTED to write music when I was in college.  I wanted to be a pop star like Prince, or George Michael.  That isn’t the BEST reason to want to write, but it is A reason. 

When did you take a step to start writing music?

My very first song was written at the piano I got from my grandparents when I was in my early teens.  I am not sure if that manuscript still exists in a box somewhere, my guess is not. I do know the first full-fledged song I wrote was at Coe College, where I was majoring in music. 

What was your first piece of music released, and what inspired it?

First piece of music released was my first CD, “Evolutions.” It was a collection of songs inspired by a break-up and my path back to myself.  It has some good songs on it, and some not-so-good songs on it.  But it tells a story from start to finish.  

What was your latest music released, and what inspired it?

My newest single is called “Gotta Rewind Myself” and it is inspired by the line from “The Empire Strikes Back” where Yoda says to Luke, “You must unlearn what you have learned.”  That line has always spoken to me. 

I understand that as we go through life, we pick up beliefs that our parents, teachers and friends hold, and many of those beliefs do not hold water.  We forget that when we came here, we were a blank slate and all the things we “know” we have learned.  This song is about remembering who we were before we dulled our shine by adapting beliefs that do not serve us and letting them run our lives.

For example, in High School I was fearless.  I was in theater, band, speech team, I did the morning announcement, I was on Student Council—all things that would label me a geek and I didn’t care! 

Then I got to college and got into social circles, and I wanted to be liked—to be cool. Well, that came at a price.  It wasn’t “cool” to be associated with certain people or to act a certain way.  But if you paid that price, you got invited to all the parties… so I paid the price.  And that was dumb. So now I have to unwind that belief from my psyche and go back to the way I used to be.  

It’s a rockabilly vibe meets big band. SUPER fun to sing. Oh, and “Gotta Rewind Myself” is the clean, radio-friendly version.  The real version lives on my website. 

Focusing on your latest piece of music. What were your biggest challenges with Gotta Rewind Myself?

Cleaning up the lyrics for radio!  The whole first verse had to be rewritten with the same meaning, but nicer words.  I am not sure if I can swear here, but the original text was, “When I was young, I was taught to give a shit, while that certainly is true, they forgot to add only give a shit about things that ignite the spark in you.”

We know for George Carlin’s “7 words you can’t say on television” that the first word is top of the list!  So that line became, ‘When I was young, I was taught that I should care…”

So two versions of the song exist.  I recorded the vocals (and it’s a heavy, sort of Andrew Sisters vocal vibe), mixed them both and released them to the world. 

What are you working on right now?

I am working on my first ever Christmas song.  Last year in Minnesota it was a wet, warm Christmas—no snow.  We had plans with a friend of ours, which got cancelled.  My sister-in-law had Covid in the house, so those plans cancelled. My husband’s dad is in Arizona, my sister and her family are in Seattle, my parents are gone… it just didn’t feel like Christmas.

So I wrote a song about loss at the holidays.  But the song isn’t so much sad as just an acknowledgement that the singer remembers how it use to be and it just doesn’t feel the same.  

I gave it a retro vibe with a contemporary Latin drum lick, which morphs into a kind-of Vince Guaraldi vibe at the bridge.  …and the bridge harkens back to Christmas icons, A Charlie Brown Christmas, Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer, “How the Grinch Stole Christmas”.  

Like most of my style, it’s very vocal dependent… but I think it’s catchy and even though there is loss in it, the vibe leaves you hopeful.

Do you keep to a theme with your music, or just go where the mood strikes?

Well, I keep on a positive vibe, but I am not bound by a certain theme.  I guess spirituality always weaves its way in, but both stylistically and musically I am all over the board. 

My iPhone has an eclectic mix of music I like to listen to depending on my mood, so I write like that—as the mood or feel strikes me.  You will find classical music in my repertoire, (“Emergence”, “Stardust Once Again”), New Age music (“Perpetual Motion of Water”, “In Paradisum”,” Sunrise Fanfare”), Christian Music, (“Jesus to the World”,” One in Christ”), Jazz (“Spirit!”, “In this Moment”), and of course rock and roll (the rest). 

What is your favorite piece of music you’ve recorded, and what do you love about it?

You mean which of my children do I love the best?  I would say lyrically and sonically I love “Artist’s Prayer” because of the chill vibe and lush vocals.  “Gotta Rewind Myself”, however, my supplant that… time will tell. 

Do you find other people’s music inspires you? Who do you listen to most?

I have been a huge fan of Prince since the 1980’s, so his influence is huge on both me and my music.  I also listen to Robyn a lot.  Harry Styles and his sound hold a special place in my heart as does the music of Walk the Moon.

I really keep a rotation going on my music, and I am always inspired by unique sounds and colors.  When I hear those, I home in on that for a while.  But the playlist keeps rotating. 

Do you record and produce your own music, or pay musicians and producers?

Yes, and yes. All of my music released since 2000 is produced and recorded by me in my Forgiveness Unity studios here in Plymouth Minnesota.  I am almost everything you hear on the tracks, except the amazing guitar (the crappy guitar is me; the amazing guitar is the incomparable Alex Maiers). I hire Alex to do most of my guitar work.  

What instruments do you play?

I am a percussionist by degree (I have a BM in percussion performance).  But I also play piano, bass and guitar.  Percussion is a huge field, so all the handpan sounds are me and all the toy percussion—congas, shakers, claves, singing bowls, etc… like I said, it’s a big field.

Do you like performing live, or does it scare you? Where can people watch you?

I love playing live, but my world really changed post pandemic.  I play drums for a local theater company here in the Twin Cities and have played 100s of shows with them, however, I am developing my other gifts, namely being a tarot card reader and psychic, so that has been my live focus (other than playing at church).  I like writing and releasing music online for the moment. 

People can see my live performances on my You Tube channel.

Is your music available to the public, and where can people listen to it?

Of course!  I am available on all streaming platforms, but if you truly want to support independent artist, buy music from our websites.  We get ALL the profits from that instead of the literal fractions of a cent for a stream.

You can hear (and purchase—hint hint) all my music at https://PaulDavidMusic.net

Are you able to make music full time, or do you have day job?

Oh, I have a day job and a couple side gigs!  I am the Director of Employee Development for a food service management company here in the Twin Cities.  We are a national company and I help train our staff. 

Are your friends and family supportive of your music career?

Yes.  They listen and purchase my music.  They are very supportive.  

What’s something you never expected about writing music? What have you learned that surprised you?

How absolutely amazing it feels to hear something you created come to life—be that a live performance of things that came from your head, or hearing your music on the radio.  That is an incredible high that I didn’t expect.

I remember the first time I rehearsed my first band before recording “Evolutions”, I said it felt like my balls were on a table and everyone had a sledgehammer!  I was so nervous for people to hear my music—what if they didn’t like it?  

Well, as time has gone on, I have come to terms with the fact not everyone will like my music—and that’s OK. I don’t write to please anyone but myself.  Sure, it would be amazing of other embraced what I have created, but it is not a requirement.  THAT surprised me a bit. 

Have you had any experiences that really stand out because of your music?

Back in the 1990’s I taught drumline for the marching band where I went to high school, Bloomington Kennedy in Bloomington, Minnesota.  Just this last week, I got a note from one of my former students from that drumline which was truly amazing and touched my heart… “thanks for taking that ungrateful 6AM-everyday-summer-job where you had to listen to a bunch of high school hacks pound away on their terrible sounding drums until they didn’t sound terrible anymore.  You made a huge difference in all our lives.  Some more directly than others, but for sure it made a difference for everyone.”  

This guy has turned into a teacher and composer of new music, electronic music, and sound design.  He credits my working with him so many years ago as one of the catalysts for his career.  I mean, how can that NOT validate my choice to pursue music? When I received that note, it truly blew me away.  I remember him and those morning rehearsals. And trust me, unless you’ve had 20 high school kids with drums and sticks in a room with you at 6AM, you just cannot imagine the experience!  Ha!  You truly never know the impact you and your art can have on the world.  

What is the first piece of advice you would give to anyone inspired to write music?

Have no expectation on the outcome.  Just write.  Write for you.  Don’t write to become famous.  Don’t write like someone else.  Write your truth.  Write from your voice.  The world needs to hear YOUR unique perspective.

And, finally, are your proud of your accomplishment? Was it worth the effort?

This is a really weird question—at least the first part.  Of course, I am proud of what I have done and where I am. I worked hard to get here, and I am still doing it! 

And to me, of course, it was worth it. 

Here’s the deal, in my opinion, this whole music thing is always worth it—no matter if the outcome is a superstar status or one song sung in a small country church.   Creativity is always worth it.  Art and creativity in general bring light into the world.  Look around you.  Don’t you think the world could use a little more light?

Pop all your music, website and social media links here so the readers can find you:

Website: https://PaulDavidMusic.net

Linktree: https://linktr.ee/PDStanko

You Tube: @PaulDvd69

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@pauldvd69

X:@Pauldvd69

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