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Kickall: The Adventures of Goatbag and Scapegoat: Unique book for footie lovers, as related by – wait for it – a musical goat and a word bending word smith. Set in parallel universe have fun translating the names and double meanings into our own football scene. All true stories.
Whether you love it or hate it, there’s no denying that football brings people together. All the reasons behind the love of The Beautiful Game are captured in this highly-entertaining yet informative book by one supposed musical goat called E. Scapegoat – the handle for its actual author and soccer devotee, Chris Gunstone.
It will appeal to the teen market as well as those who diligently and loyally follow their own home teams every weekend come hail, blow, snow or burning sun. A slightly novel but wonderful publication.
For years soccer has been given the title The Beautiful Game through merchandising, promotions, and sportscasting shows. The origins of the term date back to the 1950s when commentator Stuart Hall used it to describe the way Manchester City played. It then became universal in 1977 when Brazilian soccer great Pele used it to describe the game in his book.
Ever since those days, people around the globe recognize the sport by this title. But, for people who have never watched or played it, this title seems a bit odd. They may ask, why is soccer so special?
E. Scapegoat – aka Chris Gunstone – captures the fanatic essence of it all in ‘Kickall: The Adventures of Goatbag and Scapegoat.’ There are probably four good reasons for the sport garnering this much respect. The first would be celebration, regardless of outcomes. Football brings people together with the common love of the game. Secondly, whether you’re a fan or not, it unites the world. No matter where you come from, how rich or how poor, how young or old, you can bond with people over the game.
Even in the worst times during human history, soccer has managed to bridge the gap between people in ways that no other game ever could. One of the best examples of this is during the FWW. On Christmas Day in 1914, however, humanity would shine through the darkness. German and English troops came together in the spirit of the holiday and stopped fighting. When they met in the middle, there were culture and language barriers that made some of the interaction difficult. As many traded souvenirs with one another an exciting idea was passed around.
Soon a small soccer match would start between the trench lines. Through all this horror and death people were able to come together and enjoy a simple soccer match. The game unified enemies to share something special: fun.
Thirdly, it evokes a passion beyond words. For many fans, soccer is their entire lives. You would be hard pressed to find a group of people more passionate about the game than the fans of Italy, specifically fans for the club Roma. Every year in Italy, the Serie A league produces some of the most competitive matches in the sport, with many of the world’s best teams trying to secure a spot in the fabled UEFA Champions League tournament. Fourthly, and probably most importantly, football is anyone’s game.
The final, and perhaps most important, reason that soccer is so beautiful is that anyone can play it and anyone can win. This was displayed perfectly by Leicester City winning the English Premier League in 2016 against massive 500-1 odds. To this day, it is the largest title upset in the history of the English top flight.
Yes, anyone can play it and anyone can win. An even bigger upset came in 2018 and shows the best example of soccer being a game for anyone. In the 2018 Champions’ League group stage, English giants Liverpool matched up with Red Star Belgrade.
Many people would be hard pressed to even find Red Star’s home nation of Serbia on a map, let alone be familiar with the Serbian professional league. For those who don’t know much about the Serbian league, the players are not paid as handsomely as those in other top European leagues.
In fact, many of their players have second and third jobs to supplement their income during the soccer season. It didn’t matter that Liverpool had over twice as many foreign players – Red Star won because, in soccer, anything can happen.
Who could forget the Euros 2004 when Greece with no stars playing multi-million pound players won the tournament against all the TV pundits predictions even at half-time still insisting they could not win.
An insight into the national sport of the planet by one who works in the top football League. From the sport’s origins, its sporting heroes, right up to modern times.
Set in the fantasy Lionman Island on a parallel universe, fans of the beautiful game will find much to surprise and enjoy.
It’s explained that author E. Scapegoat is a Kickall fan, musician, writer, who has produced hit albums of Goatland dance music with his musical friend Goatbag.
Here’s an amusing extract from the book:
He did not get his transfer
Arrycan has got the blues
He’s given up his golden boot
For a pair of shoes…
And the hard reality of player power in getting rid of their manager by losing games
…It’s a subtle go slow strike home and away
But the team’s wages still get payed
And the players do not get the sack
It’s the manager that gets all the flack
Directors panic our low positions’ chronic
You are fired, clear your desk, we need a tonic
All you did for them and not so much as a look
Told you to go and sling your hook,
But do have some tea while you wait
Till the interpreter comes to translate,
No! I don’t wait, I will go,
You’re fired in any language we managers know.
This Kickall book is part of a series of six covering different adventures, the band with a hit record, administrator, Brexit, and football. They are written to also interest and amuse the parents who often read to their children.
In essence, a book for older kids and the young at heart.
E. Scapegoat is a musical goat but with musical work few and far between he takes different jobs as you have to earn a living. He finds a job working for the football League Champions and Cup winners. Best job ever he writes down his wonderful experiences in ‘Kickall: The Adventures of Goatbag and Scapegoat’ and gives a good insight into football.
Scapegoat writes about football’s origins, all true stories of its development and heroes who inspire wonder and excitement, how it grew into the national sport and the whole planet up to modern times. A bastion for the Beautiful Game and to keep out Ugly Game players.
Says Scapegoat: “You want to shirt pull, dive and foul? Go and join a Rugby club – it is legal there. In the pure spirit of football ‘No player would stoop so low as to commit a foul’ was the creed of footballers. No matter how corrupted and seduced players get by money that pure spirit of football always rises again because it is the root of football.”
This is what the fans want – real football, the game they love and go out in all weathers to endure and support teams many who will never win a title or a trophy but go to see a good game – the Beautiful Game!
‘Kickall: The Adventures of Goatbag and Scapegoat’ by E Scapegoat and Chris Gunstone (ISBN 9798786001984) is independently published and available at Amazon in paperback, RRP £9.99, and for free for Unlimited Kindle subscribers. Details at: www.amazon.co.uk/KICKALL-Adventures-Goatbag-Scapegoat/dp/B09NR5XN5N/
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